Can your Spam: The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit

I was leery of The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit (1957): Gregory Peck, Jennifer Jones, technicolor, big budget "message" picture. I couldn't help but be reminded of the Duel in the Sun (1946) debacle which ended weeks of agonizing with the white flag of "I don't know what to make of this." Well, I know what to make of the Man in the Gray Flannel Suit. The man is hot. As for the movie, it is at least closer to achieving its goals as a message picture than Duel in the Sun.

It's the story of Tom Rath, a war veteran who is hoping to get ahead in business and make his suburban home life a bit happier in the process. As Tom rides the train from Connecticut into Manhattan he flashes back to scenes of the Second World War. He remembers killing a young German soldier to get his winter coat, accidentally killing his best friend with a grenade and the shell-shock episode it triggered. He spends a fair amount of time reliving his own version of Roman Holiday, in which he has an affair with starving Italian woman named Maria (Marisa Pavan) who is so completely charming, self-sacrificing, vulnerable and out and out stupid that one feels very conflicted about his behavior toward her. On one hand he's a complete rat for not trying harder to look her up after the war, on the other hand she's a woman who first slept with him for a can of SPAM, knew that he was married and still wanted to have his baby on her own.

Jennifer Jones plays Betsey Rath, who at first appears to be a '50s suburban Lady MacBeth, but grows more likable as the film goes on, especially as it becomes inevitable that she's going to get it with both barrells full of the truth about her hubby's history with canned meat prositutes. There is a somewhat tedious subplot about Tom's new boss, Mr. Hopkins, at the TV network (Frederick March) and his troubled home life. As good it as it is to see March onscreen with Ann Harding who plays his wife, the whole thing is handled with enormous ham (SPAM?) fists. Hopkins warns Tom that he has to take care of his family while he has a chance, lamenting the son lost in the war and the daughter "lost" to an unwise elopement. Conveniently for Tom, his moral dilemma about whether he should be spending so much time at the office when he knows he should be taking care of his own troubled brood is solved when his boss gives him permission to simply be a "9 to 5 man." Dilemma solved. Now it's home to mop up a small raft of "Father Knows Best" scale crises and of course the problem like Maria.

One of the more astringent aspects of the movie is a fairly harsh criticism of the way that television effects the average family. The Rath's children are creepily strung out on violent westerns and more than a little morbid for it. This seems a bit rich coming from the movie industry, which can't exactly claim to have never put a bad idea in a child's head. Consider also that TV was killing the studio system that was making big technicolor message pictures like this and it seems more than a little hypocritical. Mr. Hopkins, a man who has supposedly spent his whole life building a television network to the detriment of his personal life, tells Tom "Turn the TV off. Kick it in if you have to. Spend time with your kids."

For all this raging hypocrisy, what makes The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit interesting is not just the actual man in the gray flannel suit, because if you've learned anything from this blog, it won't surprise you that I really enjoyed Peck's performance. ( The movie is a good showcase of a wide range of emotions and when he's not skillfully emoting just enough he's projecting integrity all over the parts of the movie that are a little bit thin.) It works as a message about the dangers of materialism because it is so steeped in the 1950s that its trying to decry. Every piece of set decoration, from the gleaming Herman Miller furniture in Tom's new office to his pretty secretary, clad in a skin tight gray flannel wiggle dress is a seductive reminder of just how wonderful it was to have decade of pure self-indulgence and confidence after the Depression and the War and how completely wrong it was for the country to undergo those two calamities for mere prosperity. With a total absence of prosperity you have Italian women selling their bodies for commodity grade meat and meat byproducts and with too much prosperity you have Jennifer Jones wanting her husband to sell his soul for a new washing machine. Rath is walking a tight rope of "safe choices" that will both keep his family in reasonable comfort and his conscience from keeping him awake nights. While working on a PR campaign for the network on behalf of mental health, Tom has to choose between being a yes man or telling the truth. I couldn't help but wish that he'd told the truth about his own break with "mental health" during the war, but it really is cataclysmic enough for him to say, "I thought your approach on this speech was wrong."

Feeling so good about speaking truth to power, Tom decides to speak truth to Betsey and then things get a bit crazy. He ends up tackling her on the lawn. The movie pulls out of a total lust in the dust tailspin as Betsey decides to forgive Tom and help set up a trust fund for his son in Italy and I'm assuming a life time supply of SPAM for the mother. So here I am again defending yet another movie where a guy cheats on his wife and she forgives him. Well, yes and no. I'm left with lingering doubts about his truthfulness about Maria. For someone who is supposedly long forgotten he sure thinks about her a lot, spending as much time daydreaming about the good times as feeling bad about leaving her preggers in a war zone. His final "I worship you" to Betsey rings as hollow as an empty tin of SPAM blowing across the Piazza Navona. So yeah, maybe I am back to "I don't know what to make of this" but at least I won that bet with myself that I could reference SPAM in a blog post ten times. What's that you say, not quite there yet? Well, to paraphrase another PR man from this era, Jim Blandings, "If you're not eating WHAM, you're not eating ham."

Duel in the Sun (1946)

I watched this move months ago now and I still don't know what to make of it. It was too dark to be "lurid, stupid fun" (as one web critic put it on Rotten Tomatoes) and too over-blown and backward to be the ahead of it's time Jeremiad on racism that it aimed to be.

Still, there is much to admire in Duel in the Sun. Gregory Peck gives a first rate performance as the bad son who winds up loving Jennifer Jones to death. For her part, she plays the confused, conflicted "half breed" with a nice mixture of sultry and sweet. The victim of racism, rape and just plain bad luck, she ends up loosing the love of good son, Joseph Cotton and is left to the mercy of the bad one. Turns out mercy just really isn't his style.

The movie comes to a bloody, twisted end in the titular duel, with Jennifer Jones arriving in gauchos on a horse (I love movies where women wear gauchos, which is why I mention it...) to seemingly save Peck who is on the lam for shooting Joseph Cotten (also in the sun, but that is less than a duel). When Peck shows his lovely, unshaven face, she pulls out a rifle and blows him away. He shoots her back because, gosh darn it, that really hurt! They spend the next ten minutes dragging their bloodied half dead bodies toward one another to die in one another's arms. Man, somebody involved in writing this picture must have just gotten out of a really bad relationship. I have a soft spot for fatalistic love stories like this and any movie where a guy is so hot that you stay with him even though you know he will probably be the death of you, is one that I can't resist.

Sub Mission: A tribute to submarine movies

Cary Grant in Destination Tokyo. If there isn't a scene like this in every sub movie, there should be.

I love a good submarine movie. There's something about the genre. You can say what you want about the Freudian symbolism of the craft, but I wonder if it's a coincidence that they all have at least one scene where the men start stripping off their wet shirts to deal with the heat and oppressive atmosphere. It's always Tennessee Williams hot on board a submarine, in more ways than one.

Das Boot goes for gritty (and sweaty) realism.

Probably the best sub movie of all time is Das Boot. It's also the longest. I've heard rumors of five hour cuts of this film. That's a lot of submarine. Even I might tire of a submerged tin can full of pent up testoreone and men in wet shirts. Nah. Who am I kidding? If one of my loyal readers sent me the five hour Das Boot, I'd watch it. This is a hint, people, by the way.

I dug up the trailer for Crimson Tide (1995) on Youtube. Watch for a pre-Sopranos James Gandolphini saying "Dive, Dive" and sweating a lot. Notice how everyone is sweating a lot in the clip. And in the scenes where they aren't sweating it's raining really hard, just to up the wateriness quotient of the movie, I guess.

Gable: They carried the whole "wet look" a bit too far.

One of the dramatic devices of Crimson tide, the clash between an old captain and a younger officer, is a recurring theme in the genre. From Charles Laughton and Gary Cooper in Devil in the Deep (1932) to Harrison Ford and Liam Neeson in K-19, the Widowmaker (2002), you pretty much now that two things are going to happen. The young guy is gonna get wet and then he's gonna yell at the older guy. In Run Silent, Run Deep (1958), it's the old guy, Clark Gable who gets wet.

After the yelling and the second guessing, there will be certainly be a contrastingly quiet scene where almost we hear is that "Boop....booop" noise that you always hear in the background in a sub movie. That's usually the cue to start the tech talk. "Crush depth," "fire torpedos," "up, persicope" and the like. I love all the tech talk in a sub movie. It reminds me of Battlestar Galactica, which is really every kind of navy battle movie set in space. You definitely have the submarine thing, because they put their nukes in tubes and fire them like torpedos. Every time Admiral Adama (Edward James Olmos) starts barking out navigational coordinates, you can tell that President Roslin (Mary McDonnel) just wants to jump his bones. Submarine movies have long extended sequences where people talk in this kind of gibberish and yet it's always tense and dramatic.

Gregory Peck and his periscope in On the Beach.

Speaking of Battlestar Galactica, I wouldn't be surprised if the creators of that series had seen On The Beach with Ava Gardner and Gregory Peck. They are both about people coping with the end of the world. How do survivors move on with their lives and what problems do they have hooking up with other survivors. Turns out they have a lot of issues. Gregory Peck plays a submarine commander whose surely lost his family in the war that's destroyed all of the the Northern Hemisphere, but he continues to act as if they are o.k., buying them gifts, writing letters home. Yet he's trying to come to terms with his relationship with Ava Gardner, which is like mental adultery to him. It's a very fine drama that has amazing work from Gardiner, Peck, pre-Pyscho Anthony Perkins, and Fred Astaire among others. That's why I resisted the temptation to title this whole piece "Das Booty Call: Gregory Peck in On the Beach." That would be too flippant even for me.

I wasn't expecting On the Beach (1959) to be a sub movie, since it's about nuclear war. The opening scene has Gregory Peck bending over a periscope. I had to stop the movie and replay it and say aloud, "You had me at 'up periscope' On the Beach."

Holiday Romance

After viewing Roman Holiday several times (and posting about it a lot) I started thinking about how it touched off a whole wave of films of people meeting, and falling in love while on vacation in an exotic locale. Love Affair (1939) pre-dates it, but is a sparse studio filmed production that doesn't have the same big-budget travelogue quality. The year after Roman Holiday, the city was given a full technicolor treatment by Twentieth Century Fox in Three Coins in a Fountain. The story was all-around bigger and brighter than Roman Holiday following the romantic adventures of three young American women (Dorothy McGuire, Jean Peters and Maggie McNamara) and a prince (Louis Jordan), a poor but handsome translator (Rossano Brazzi) and an ex-pat American writer (Clifton Web). Despite a fair amount of drama, this film doesn't quite follow the pattern of the genre in that it doesn't have that bittersweet feeling that inevitably the lovers must part and return home from vacation. Perhaps Fox thought the color and the happy ending could improve on Roman Holiday, but I ask, can you improve on perfection?

In 1955 two big budget travelogue romances were on offer: Alfred Hitchcock's slight To Catch a Thief which paired Grace Kelly and Cary Grant and David Lean's Summertime with Katharine Hepburn and Rossano Brazzi. For To Catch a Thief, the setting wasn't Italy, but the French Riviera and Grant played the unlikely part of a jewel thief whose gone straight but needs to catch a "copy cat" burglar. The movie is one of the most romantic that Hitchcock ever made and whole sequences are simply elaborate excuses to show the Riviera to best advantage. Whether Francine and John Robie are casing a villa or running from the law down the twisting roads in Monaco (one of which was the very road on which Grace Kelly died in a car crash years later) the whole movie seems like a wonderful excuse to show us pretty scenery. Though it's not one of Hitchcock's best and does lack much in the way of tension and suspense, it has always been a favorite for the unique pairing of Grant and Kelly and the breezy fun. Of course there is the fireworks scene which is just out and out hot.

Curiously enough Summertime also uses a fireworks display to great symbolic and romantic advantage as well. Summertime is the only one of this group of Roman Holiday spin-offs that I would say is as good as that original film. David Lean's camera is in love with Venice and every scene is just beautifully shot and arranged. He makes the heroine an photography enthusiast who spends most of her time trying to capture the perfect moment when the clockwork magi on the piazza San Marco tip their hats to one another. Fans of this film (which apparently include Woody Allen, since a number of scenes in Everyone Says I Love You were filmed in the exact locations as scenes from Summertime) make pilgrimages to Venice in the same way that fans of Roman Holiday visit the locations of that movie. I think that Summertime is the more sophisticated of the two films. It's not nearly as plot-driven and actually reminds me a lot more of the post-modern Before Sunrise/Before Sunset films. Katharine Hepburn is Jane Hudson, a woman who travels alone to Venice and gets involved with a married man (Brazzi). Though the treatment of the subject matter may seem a bit old-fashioned, I think it's dealt with in a way that honest to the time and location. I also was really drawn to the portrait of loneliness that Hepburn creates in the film. I've traveled pretty extensively on my own in Europe and I could definitely relate to many of the situations and feelings she goes through. Jane Hudson gravitates to Renato de Rossi but she is shy and comically awkward around him as well and most of the tension in the film comes from her inability to make up her mind about him. I think my favorite thing about the movie is that they seem like real people in a believable situation. Instead of the typical "meet cute" formula we are given no easy answers. When de Rossi first notices Hudson in the Piazza San Marco he gives her ankles a look of pure carnal desire that I can't remember ever having been directed at Katharine Hepburn before in a movie. She's usually the plucky gal who wins the guy with her moxie and energy, not her legs. That this is a nearly fifty year old Hepburn, makes me even happier somehow. Brazzi made his American acting debut playing opposite June Allyson as Jo March in Little Women, a role that Hepburn had played decades earlier. He has an ageless quality though and when he says he is not a young man, you believe him because he manages to look a bit world weary in much of the movie. He made something of a mini career out of these films appearing in Three Coins in a Fountain, Summertime, Light in the Piazza (1962) and Rome Adventure (1962).

Hollywood continued it's love affair with the Holiday Romance with An Affair to Remember (1957) a remake of Love Affair (1939) which added color, music and more riviera scenery to the melodramatic love story. Though, It's never been my favorite Cary Grant movie, over the years I've come to appreciate the light comedy early in the film and enjoy that bittersweet feeling of parting when the vacation ends and real life begins.

The genre held out into the 1960s getting a further update with MGM's clever The Yellow Rolls Royce (1964) that manages to cram in more travel and more romance simply by making the story take place over different decades with the car as the constant. While I find the middle Italian adventure between Shirley McClain and her gigilo lover to be maddeningly annoying, it is book-ended by Rex Harrison/Jeane Moreau and Omar Shariff/Ingrid Bergman stories. The latter is particularly delightful as it features Yugoslavia and Shariff in a huge sheepskin coat. There's just something about a guy in fur. On vacation. In a yellow rolls royce.

He tasks me, people, he heaps me

Gregory Peck attempting to look unattractive as Captain Ahab in John Huston's Moby Dick.

Those of you who've been following along since the beginning can trace the dawn of a new obsession in my film viewing life: Gregory Peck. I can't figure out if it's the face, the VOICE or that over-eager quality he has in the love scenes, but I'm gaga for Gregory. And this just happened in the past month or so, while watching Spellbound for the umpteenth time.

Today I'm going to talk about two Peck movies, both adaptations of novels, the underrated Valley of Decision (1945) and the impossible to overrate Moby Dick (1956). Valley of Decision is on the surface a Cinderella romance between the scion of a Pittsburgh mill owner (Peck) and the family's loyal a Irish maid (Greer Garson). Midway through this simple romantic drama gets a lot more complicated and begins to take on a grander topics such as class and the moral duty of industry to its workers. Imagine a combination of "Jane Eyre" and Elizabeth Gaskell's "North and South" and you might have the film version of Valley of Decision. I've not read the novel, but I understand it to be much broader in scope, taking place over 60 years.

The romance between Garson and Peck is slow to build, but their chemistry is such that the audience is left in little suspense when Jessica Tandy is introduced as a rival for Paul Scott's affections. The pacing of the film feels like a novel, taking time to flesh out minor characters and lay out the simmering plot conflicts. There are good performances here from Donald Crisp, Lionel Barrymore and Gladys Cooper as the elder generation who can't change the way things are whether they want to or not. I wonder if this movie had been made ten years earlier if it would have had an entirely different set of sympathies. As it is, the Scott's are portrayed as honest and hardworking people who want the best for their workers and the unions and strikes are shown as not entirely the root of all evil, but close enough to it. As in "North and South," a high value is placed on the power of individuals and friendships across classes to save the day. The most interesting thing about Valley of Decision is its ending, which twists away from all expected paths and leads to a complicated, somewhat ambiguous denouement.

No such worries about ambiguity when viewing John Huston's colossal Moby Dick. You pretty much know where you're headed from the first ten minutes when Ismael (Richard Baseheart) ducks in to a pub on a stormy night and meets his future shipmates from the Pequod. Melville's novel was fairly stuffed with foreshadowing and Huston (with script help from science fiction master, Ray Bradbury) doesn't leave out any of it.

The studio insisted that a "name" be cast as Ahab (apparently John Huston wasn't enough of a "name" for movie posters, since many involved in the production felt that the director should also star) and Peck was chosen. Not only do Huston and Bradbury produce an Ahab for a movie star, they create an Ahab who IS a movie star. I don't remember Ahab from the book being so charismatic, but when Peck offers up a round of grog in "the manner of my sea-faring forefathers" for his men and makes them swear death to Moby Dick you can feel why the motley crew of the Pequod are willing to follow him into doom against all reason. Later as things get much worse for the men, Ahab repeats the ceremony in a frightening spectacle of demagoguery. Though the whale gets top billing as the monster in the film, it is really Ahab who chills, and the filmmakers wisely use him sparingly, saving the revelation of his character for the end of the first act.

Watching Moby Dick, I was mentally daring Gregory Peck to be attractive. After all he was literally hobbled with a peg leg, bushy beard, nasty 8 inch facial scar and no love story in sight. Could he do it? About half way through his speech "He tasks me. He heaps me." I found myself involuntarily kicking my feet in delight. Shortly afterward when he hears that the whale is within a day's sail of the Pequod the unabashed joy and anticipation is something quite close to that "over eager" quality I mentioned early.

I was expecting Moby Dick to look dated, but I was surprised at how good the water sequences are and at no point are the whales in the movie, comically fake. I think the effects actually were better than the 1998 mini series version with Patrick Stewart, which had a terrible CGI Moby that drew snorts from everyone at my house. Actually Peck's cameo as Father Mapple is probably the best thing in that movie. I much prefer Stewart's few Ahab moments in Star Trek the Next Generation to going the whole distance with him.

Huston's movie is at its best when its in adventure mode and has a surprisingly light touch with the friendship between Ismael and Queequeg. Still, it's Peck performance that convinces the audience that sensible Starbuck who earlier in the film suggest mutiny, would succumb to Ahabmania. The words "Captain Ahab" are almost synonymous with unhealthy obsession, and I would not be so flip as to suggest that the unhappy mariner could be cured by writing a blog about whale migrations. But given the love look on Ahab's face when he gets within 10 sea miles of Moby Dick, might I suggest a dalliance with a saucy Irish chambermaid?

Joe's Apartment: 51 Via Margutta

The spot where Joe gave the princess cab fare inside the gates at 51 Via Margutta.

Well my guest bloggers rebelled a bit on Roman Holiday, but I can't stop thinking about it. Last night I dreamed about Joe's Apartment. I dreamed I had a huge panoramic picture of it that I made interactive so that when you'd click on say Joe's desk it would pop a little factoid about it. How I wish I could provide the world with such a useful thing, but alas, it is not to be since panoramic pictures of 56 year old movie sets are nowhere to be had. Hoping for the next best thing, I googled 51 Via Margutta and looked at some pictures of the real life street where the movie was filmed. It's even prettier in color.

Speaking of which I was arguing with my mom last night about whether Roman Holiday was in color or not. Turns out she was thinking of Three Coins in a Fountain, a movie that came along the next year that tried to capitalize on the successful formula. (An american woman meets a European Prince in Rome. See TOTALLY different, idea.) She's never actually seen Roman Holiday which seems crazy to me since she could have actually watched it in the theater when it came out. Why wouldn't you? It's funny how when you are obsessed with something you expect everyone else to give the same level of importance to some obscure thing as you do. To her, Three Coins in a Fountain was just as good. As if.

Also while looking for pictures of Via Margutta, I found this blog entry. I direct your attention to the comments which rapidly degenerate into an argument about who would win in a fist fight Cary Grant or Gregory Peck. I think most people under estimate Cary's capacity to give a beat down.

Tonto, Tarzan and Frankenstein vs. Roman Holiday

Back by popular demand, (theirs, not my readers') guest bloggers Tonto, Tarzan and Frankenstein take on one of the most romantic movies of all time, Roman Holiday.

Tonto and Friends think Princess Audrey most pretty movie star, ever. She make much hand shake and tall shoes hurt feet. She say "I'm so happy," but she no seem happy. She seem bored and little sad too. She dance with many ugly old men. Short old men. This no help her mood. She get ready for bed. She want to wear pajamas, "just the top half" and she make talk of people who no wear clothes to bed. Now Tonto confess he no wear clothes to bed. He say to Princess Audrey, you should try sometime.

Princess Audrey no want to eat crackers and milk before bed.

Frankenstein: Guh. Me like crackers.

Aunt start to read schedule. She make much talk and Princess Audrey look angry. Finally she scream. Tonto have to turn down volume cause Princess Audrey scream too loud. Aunt think Princess maybe crazy. She call doctor and he give her shot to make her sleep. They leave. Look up at ceiling and statues watch Princess Audrey. Tonto no like to sleep in that room either. He no blame her when she escape from palace to find fun.

Mr. Bradley play poker with Irving and reporter men. They have Italian wampum with much numbers and little value. Look funny, long and skinny like piece of toilet paper this wampum. Mr. Bradley lose so he walk home. He see Princess Audrey asleep on park bench. He stop to help her. She talk funny poetry and she follow him home in taxi. She no tell Mr. Bradley she is princess. Princess Audrey very sleepy from shot but Mr. Bradley think she drink too much fire water. She start to take off her dress in front of him. "I've never been alone with a man before so being alone with one without my dress is highly unusual." Tonto think this is perhaps most awkwardly-worded pick up of all time.

Tarzan: Mr. Bradley is man or is mouse? Tarzan see Jane take off dress. Tarzan jump bones. End of movie.

Tonto: Tonto respectfully ask Tarzan to shut hell up. He raised by apes. No excuse. He walk upright and he have brain of human. Mr. Bradley is gentleman. He no pull funny stuff with girl who drink too much firewater. That why he in movie with Princess Audrey and Tarzan not.

Mr. Bradley tell Princess to sleep on sofa. He leave apartment while she put on pajamas. Tonto wonder if just top half but hard to tell because she covered up and sleeping in Mr. Bradley's bed when he come back. He get mad and he have funny scene where he roll her onto couch without waking her up. Mr. Bradley oversleep and wake up at noon. He supposed to interview Princess, same one sleeping in room, but he no know that. He go to work and pretend he did interview. Boss yell at him because interview was no go. Princess Audrey is "sick," but we know she in Mr. Bradley's room on couch. Then Mr. Bradley see picture of Princess. He call landlord and tell him to make sure she no leave. Then he tell boss he have big story.

Mr. Bradley go home. Landlord is standing guard with gun. Tonto like landlord for being prepared, but wonder if he not draw more attention than necessary. Princess Audrey still asleep. Mr Bradley put her in his bed, this time he carry like romantic Princess, until he look like he going to drop her. Gregory Peck not get much credit as comic actor, but he make Tonto much laugh.

Princess Audrey start to talk to Mr. Bradley in sleep. She tell him "I dreamed I met a strong, handsome man on the street. But he was so mean to me. It was wonderful." Tonto think that best line in whole movie. Tonto think that sum up all romantic comedy movie plot.

Then Princess Audrey wake up and meet Mr. Bradley. She very confused. He no let on he knows who she is. He try very hard to keep her in apartment. He tell her take bath and he leave again to phone Irving. Irving have much fun take picture of sexy Italian lady. Irving no want to go but he say he be at restaurant later. Meanwhile maid go to Mr. Bradley's apartment to clean. Tonto wonder how man with no kitchen has maid. Maid open bathroom door and scare princess Audrey. Then yell in Italian. Tonto no understand Italian but think maybe word "tramp" involved.

Princess Audrey leave but she have no wampum. Mr. Bradley give his last wampum to her. He follow her as she walk around Rome. She buy gladiator sandals because as saying goes, When in Rome... She get all hair cut off. Tonto sometime tired of long hair too so can understand her feeling. Barber is reluctant but he do. Then he ask Princess Audrey on date. She say no, but he ask her to come meet him with much friends at dance on barge.

Tarzan: Me like barber. He best man in movie. He see what he want. He no take "no" for answer, like mouse man.

Tonto agree. Barber is secret hero of movie. Princess Audrey say maybe she meet him later and go. Then Mr. Bradley follow her and she buy gelato.

Frankenstein: Gelato gooood. Me prefer it to ice creaaaaaaam!

He pretend he just bump into her. Tonto think Princess Audrey pretty gullible at this point. Mr. Bradley offer to take her to all things she always wanted. Princess Audrey tell Mr. Bradley she ran away from school and that her name is Anya Smith. He pretend to believe her. Mr. Bradley take her Colliseum and they ride on Vespa. Then they meet Irving at restaurant. Irving start to say that she look like Princess but Mr. Bradley keep spill drink on him to shut him up. This running gag, but Tonto no think so funny. Irving reaction always same --make joke tedious.

They take princess Audrey to wishing wall and she make wish. She look at Mr. Bradley and say wish not likely to come true. Then they take her mouth of truth. Mr. Bradley scare her and she scream again. Again, Tonto have to turn down volume. Princess Audrey have healthy lungs. She try drive Vespa and they have crazy time. Police arrest Mr. Bradley and Princess. He tell them they newly weds and they let him go. Then people in police station kiss Princess Audrey because they think she is bride. One fat sweaty man even kiss Mr. Bradley but he only shake Irving's hand. Poor Irving. Why no love from fat, sweaty guy?

Then Mr. Bradley send Irving home to develop film. They go to dance on barge. Princess Audrey rest head on Mr. Bradley's chin. She look much more happy then when she dance with old men at beginning of movie. Tonto wonder why Mr. Bradley no kiss her? (Squaw put face on Tonto's chin, you be sure Tonto kiss. ) Then they meet barber and he dance with Princess.

Tarzan: Ha! You snooze. You lose, mouse man!

Tonto think Tarzan right. Mr. Bradley maybe think so too. He look jealous and he go to bar to drink fire water. He see Irving and they drink fire water together. Then police detectives spot Princess Audrey and one make dance with her. She scream again, "Mr. Bradley!" and then big fight start. Princess Audrey hit policeman with guitar.

Frankenstein: Gaaaah. Hitting funny.

Mr. Bradley and Princess run away from barge. One last police hide and he punch Mr. Bradley who fall in water. Princess Audrey jump in water and they swim away. Now Tonto know why Mr. Bradley no kiss her before because now both wet and is dark. Tonto notice in movies when people get wet they kiss. Is like rule or something.

They go back to Mr. Bradley's apartment and she put on him robe. She offer to cook and clean for him and he say he no have kitchen but that he move to place that does. She say "yes" in meaningful way. Tonto wonder if this count as marriage proposal. If brave move tipi and squaw cook and clean for him then that is marriage to Tonto. Instead they hug and then she go to change clothes to go home.

Tarzan: Me hate Roman Holiday. Why mouse man need engraved invitation? She wearing him robe. She said she cook and clean for him. Why he no jump bones?

Tonto no understand either, Tarzan. Tonto think maybe he not able to give her life of princess so he scared.

Frankenstein: She does duty. Duuuuuuuty, stupid.

Tonto think Frankenstein have point. She chief of her tribe. She can no run off and marry Mr. Bradley.

Tarzan:Me say she just disgusted with mouse man. She go home. Later, marry prince with balls.

Tonto think Tarzan have no soul. Maybe die lonely, bitter ape man.

Tarzan: Me think Tonto get soft watching chic flick. Best watch Caddyshack with Tarzan to be man again.

Frankenstein: Baaaaaby Ruuuuuuuth.

Tonto finish review then he smoke peace pipe with Tarzan. Watch funny Bill Murray movie.

Mr. Bradley drive Princess Audrey to palace. They kiss. He watch her walk away he cry. Tonto sad for Mr. Bradley. Princess Audrey face Aunt and Uncle. They say she neglect duty. Audrey get mad say them not say word to her again. "If I were not completely aware of my duty to my throne and my country I would not have come back tonight. Or indeed ever again. " She start to crack voice like she cry. Tonto think Frankenstein right about duty.

Mr. Bradley go home and boss is at apartment. He want story but Mr. Bradley say no. Irving come and Mr. Bradley tell him they no do story. Irving remind Mr. Bradley of money. Then Irving see Mr. Bradley upset about princess leaving so he no push issue. Tonto think Irving very good friend. Then Irving show pictures to Mr. Bradley and they make up funny captions for them. This make them happy again. They no care if get in paper and they make money. They just want make funny captions. Then they say they go next day to press conference of Princess.

Princess Audrey look different at press conference. She look like real chief of tribe. She all grown up now, just from day with Mr. Bradly. She notice him in crowd and she understand he reporter. He say that her faith in relations between people is not misplaced. This code for him not print story. Some reporter ask her about favorite city. She start to say all the same but then she say, "Rome. Without a doubt Rome. I shall treasure my visit here as long as I live." Then Mr. Bradley know she never forget him. Then she shake much hands and say "I'm so happy." When she take Mr. Bradley hand she no show emotion. She like iceberg. He hold together pretty good too. Not like Tonto and friends who cry like squaws.

Frankenstein: I had something in my eye!!!!!!

Irving give her pictures and she sneak one little look back at Mr. Bradley. Then she ends the press conference and Bradley walks down much big hallway. He look back once but he keep going. The end.

Tarzan think mouse man get what mouse man deserve. He no get girl. He no get money. He get Irving.

Frankenstein: Irrrrrrving.

Tonto think Caddyshack look better and better. No more chick flick for Tonto, Jenny Nipper.

Tarzan: Me want Caddyshack. Or Three Stooges.

Frankenstein: Hitting goood.

The case against The Paradine Case

Gregory Peck and Ann Todd in Alfred Hitchcock's The Paradine Case. Thanks to Beaky for the picture.

The Paradine Case is an excellent example of a movie that would have been much better before the Production Code. It was based on 1933 novel, in which the femme fatale, Mrs. Paradine, was partially inspired by the characters Greta Garbo played in the 20s and early 30s. It's the story of a beautiful young woman (Alida Valli) accused of poisoning her elderly, blind husband and the effect her case has on her defense attorney (Gregory Peck). One could imagine sympathy being with Mrs. Paradine, as it often was with murderesses in those pre-code movies and one could imagine the attorney's wife as being sympathetic too, but when she's beaten by the more glamorous woman, just walking out on her philandering husband. David O. Selznick jumped on the rights to the novel and attempted many drafts of a screen play that would pass through censors. There were objections to Mrs. Paradine's character as well as that of the judge who is presented as a sadist who enjoys sending people to the gallows. Fifteen years later Selznick, with help from Alma Reville and Ben Hecht, finally had a screenplay that was acceptable. Hitchcock directs, but the movie lacks the tension that drives his films forward. The courtroom scenes are a masterpiece of carefully orchestrated camera movements in a static environment and yet without that MacGuffin, the last forty-five minutes of the movie actually drag.

Laurence Olivier was the first choice for the role of Anthony Keane, an English Barrister and after a raft of other actors turned down the part, Gregory Peck was cast. He adds some fake white streaks to his hair to appear older, but doesn't use an English accent. This is odd and there is no attempt to explain it in the script. At one point it is actually quite distracting when one of the people he's interviewing for the case says that "LaTour seems different because he's a foreigner." The line just sits there, waiting for the guy to say "no offense" or for Peck to react in some way.

I'm willing to suspend disbelief though and I did enjoy The Paradine Case, though the enjoyment came from an unexpected corner--the relationship between Keane and his wife, Gay (Ann Todd). Ann Todd plays vulnerable well, without being mousy or helpless. She reminds me of Joan Fontaine in this regard. She also looks quite a bit like Fontaine, I think. So think of her as Fontaine, without the eyebrow acting. If they wanted to show a man being tempted to stray, they shouldn't have made his wife so appealing and gone to the trouble of showing that they seem to have a happy love life. It's difficult to watch her stand by her man, as she becomes aware that he is in love with, or thinks he's in love with another woman. Then she gives this crazy speech about how he has to be successful in helping her because otherwise she'll have to compete unfairly with a dead woman. It's hard to feel sympathy here because you want her to react in a way that natural. It feels like that speech was a deliberate concession to the censors. Another concession to the censors is made by toning Charles Laughton as the creepy sadist judge. Hitchcock leaves in a few hints and Laughton's performance is excellent, he still makes your skin crawl, but there is a vagueness that isn't quite right.

Trying to show the story of how this nice happily married man is seduced by a bad woman is a challenge since Mrs. Paradine is in jail and Hitchcock really only has her face to work with. He can't show her pulling a Barbara Stanwyck and hiking up her skirt. Alida Valli who was eventually cast in the Garbo role, is no Garbo. She was not even Ingrid Bergman, not by a long-shot, and that was who Selznick hire d her to replace. There's a reason you probably don't know her name and its that this was a very big movie, it cost more than Gone With the Wind to make and it lost a lot of money. Peck recovered but Valli did not. She was an unknown Italian actress and after making a few more films in America (including The Third Man) pretty much went back to being one when this was done. She is not by any means bad in the movie. She's quite good and she's an exotic beauty. She just doesn't have that thing, that Garbo had and Bergman had, that made you believe that men would risk loosing everything for her. Garbo and Bergman could play cold, remote people, but they radiated so much fire that they were mesmerizing despite the characters. Valli just seems cold and remote. If you were to imagine Ingrid Bergman in that jail cell, looking out at you, saying, "I trust you. I know you will do the right thing to save me," you'd believe that a man would go do whatever crazy thing she named. When Valli says the line, it just seems obvious that she's being manipulative and hiding something important.

Another casting issue is Louis Jordan, who seems all wrong to play Col. Paradine's long-time servant and Mrs. Paradine's lover. For there to be any mystery about the guy at all, he shouldn't look like Louis Jordan. Hitchcock was against using Jordan for the part, who was cast by Selznick and you can tell. When LaTour is first introduced his face in the dark and for the first few scenes we only see him from a distance. This builds up a semblance of suspense, but then when we meet do meet him, we think, "Oh it's Louis Jordan, well he was her boyfriend. Duh."

There are other problems with the Paradine Case, namely a whole section of the film that takes place in the Lake District where Keane goes to investigate the Paradine's summer home, Hadley Hall. There is almost no plot reason for this and it feels like Hitchcock merely wants to take you to a spooky old English house where he can build tension. The sequence is right out of Rebecca, with strange, unfriendly servants and a bedroom memorializing its former occupant, Mrs. Paradine. Perhaps the bedroom was the height of elegance at the time, but if I were in Keane's shoes when I saw the giant portrait of Mrs. Paradine hanging on the bed, I would have run a mile. Instead, a comically over-dramatic music cue finds Keane looking at Mrs. Paradine's underclothes which have been laid out by the maid. Isn't this exactly Rebecca? And it's not working here, maybe because we've seen it, but also because the woman is alive. There is a mystery around her, but what is obviously intended to be erotic just fails. This is one of the few times, I can think of Hitchcock misfiring in this realm. Perhaps in the pre-code era, one would not have had to stretch so far to find a way to symbolize Keane's erotic obsession with Mrs. Paradine. We could have had a scene in jail between the two that did so.

Eye Candy of the Day

It's not all haircuts and scooters. Sure they look happy now, but what about the next morning? The couple falling in love on vacation theme has been handled in several movies, but never so well or so bravely as in Roman Holiday. I dare you to get through this movie without at least three hankies. I dare you!



As always with this feature, click on the pic for high rez hotties! Image courtesy of Doctor Macro